New Escapologist : October 2020

Delivery Men and Children First

Hello Everyone,

How goes your pandemic? I hope you're staying healthy and sane. My cultural highlight of the month was probably the South Park Pandemic Special and it was certainly helpful on the staying sane front. I keep chuckling about it days later. That poor pangolin!

The newspapers, meanwhile, continue to run editorials about the pros and cons of working from home after nine months of it. You'd think they'd have come to terms with it by now.

A common complaint about working from home is being interrupted in your work by “delivery men” ringing the doorbell (and it’s "couriers" in this century, surely) and children demanding help or attention. The editorials either bemoan these new distractions without offering a solution or else use them as jumping off points to discuss the nauseating "upgrading" of kitchens or garden sheds (places formerly useful in their own rights) as places for professional-grade toil.

Kids and couriers may well be new distractions for the suddenly homebound employee, but don't they pale in comparison to the distractions of the open-plan office?

Off the top of my head (and on the occasion of my two-year second escape anniversary!) I recall my consciousness being shattered by the following:

– ringing telephones (mine and those of colleagues)
– computer hardware problems
– computer network problems
– fire drills and false alarms
– the bins are full
– someone’s microwaved lunch smells like farts
– sudden meetings
– long-dreaded meetings
– colleague birthday lunches
– colleague leaving lunches
– “could I just have a quick word?”
– “did anyone see [dystopian claptrap on TV] last night?”
– coffee machine malfunction
– coffee machine success
– new baby discussion
– ill-informed opinions on current affairs
– beverage spills
– fantasy football
– mild sexual harassment
– serious sexual harassment
– microaggressions
– passive aggression that comes from good people being cooped up together
– fear of someone looking at my screen and seeing my personal business
– “creative play”
– unasked-for, overly-long training session
– team bonding exercise
– too much stationery
– not enough stationery
– “does anyone know where [object] is?”
– “does anyone know who Sheila is?”
– announcement of and complaining about new estates and facilities rules
– smoking-related logistical problems
– parking-related logistical problems
– traffic- or train-related logistical problems
– people showing up for meetings on the wrong day
– ceiling tile on a troubling angle
– it’s too cold
– it’s too hot/stuffy
– plants needing water
– humans needing water
– debate around the word “potable”
– card-signing and gift money donation for Karen
– confidential shredding service is overdue
– confidential shredding service guys are in the way
– planned or unplanned construction work
– putting up Christmas decorations
– taking down Christmas decorations
– Christmas party organisation
– endless chatter about Christmas party menu options
– Christmas cards versus charity donation
– explaining about Hanukkah again
– florescent lights flickering
– health-and-safety inspection
– “who took my chair?”
– “agile”-oriented hot desk uncertainty
– room- or equipment-booking system confusion
– man on a step ladder
– specialist cleaning service
– where to recycle cardboard?
– toilets out of order
– slippy area
– existential anxiety (what am I doing here???)
– separation anxiety (from loved ones, personal projects)
– someone finally snaps and goes berserk
– so-and-so’s PA was crying in the toilets
– oh! and couriers and off-work colleagues popping in with their kids

While we're at it, couriers and kids probably shouldn't really be seen burdensome disruptions, should they? The couriers are presumably delivering something you've summoned using the incredible magic of the Internet, and the kids are presumably part of the lovely life you're working to sustain. Worth remembering, probably. Burp.

Robert Wringham
New Escapologist

Earthship Ironbank

I’m less fascinated by Tiny Houses than I used to be (because I love the city), but it’s hard not to admire the vision and chutzpah behind Earthship Ironbank.

With a single project, the couple responsible for Ironbank have addressed the problems of: making a living, finding an affordable place to live, helping the world's journey towards a solution to climate crisis, getting a qualification, finding peace of mind, adding to the world's knowledge, refusing to betray their personal values, maximising beauty, exercising intelligence, developing new skills, and creating a community. It's an astonishing Escapological success.

Dung

Reader Richard draws our attention to this remarkable poem by D. H. Lawrence. It’s called All That We Have is Life. Richard aptly remarks, “I think he was on our side!”

*clears throat.* Here goes:

All that we have, while we live, is life;
and if you don’t live during your life, you are a piece of dung.
And work is life, and life is lived in work
unless you’re a wage-slave.
While a wage-slave works, he leaves life aside
and stands there a piece of dung.

Men should refuse to be lifelessly at work.
Men should refuse to be heaps of wage-earning dung.
Men should refuse to work at all, as wage-slaves.
Men should demand to work for themselves, of themselves,
and put their life into it.
For if a man has no life in his work, he is mostly a heap of dung.

Not one to mince words was he, old D. H.?

I’ve read no Lawrence other than The Plumed Serpent, which I’m told is not typical of his work. Had Richard not passed this on to me, I doubt I’d have come across it for decades, if ever, so thanks Richard.

Thanks also to reader "Glincoln" who, recommends Lawrence's The Rocking Horse Winner, a short story (available to read online here) with an anti-materialist, pro-experience moral. Cool.

If I Learned to be Like Belasco

Here's a quote about escape from a 1980 science fiction novel called Mockingbird:

Life in prison wasn’t [so bad] and if I learned to be like [fellow inmate] Belasco I could make an easy life for myself here. There really was almost no discipline, once you learned how to avoid being beaten by the guards, just by keeping an eye out for them. Obviously, once the device of the metal bracelets had been invented, everything about running a prison had gone slack, as with so much else. There was plenty of dope, and I was used to the food and the labor. And there was TV, and Biff, my cat…

But that was only part of me. There was another, deeper part that said, “You must leave this place.” And I knew, knew even to my terror, that I had to listen to that voice.

My old programming would say, “When in doubt, forget it.” But I had to quiet that voice, too. Because it was wrong. If I was to continue to live a life that was worth the trouble of living it, I had to leave.

The Belascos among you might enjoy The Good Life for Wage Slaves, a guide to staying sane in The Trap. Get it from P+H Books or from the New Escapologist shop today. Scroll to the bottom of this newsletter for a sneaky discount.

Mockingbird was written by Walter Tevis who also wrote The Man Who Fell To Earth. The Man Who Fell To Earth is the superior book but Mockingbird is certainly very "now" and I found no small solace in it.

It tells the story of three people (one of whom is a robot) in a dystopian New York where reading is a lost art and togetherness is forbidden in favour of polite privacy. People keep setting themselves on fire in Burger King.

Our three heroes don't challenge the rules of their autocratic leaders as such but ignore them. Throwing caution to the wind, they find freedom in books and love regardless.

I'm told that one of Tevis' other novels, The Queen's Gambit, was recently adapted for Netflix. Though he died in 1984, maybe Walter Tevis is an author for the moment.

Heinleinian Man vs. Auntie Shirley

Speaking of science fiction, I just finished reading The Door Into Summer (1957) by Robert Heinlein after picking it up almost at random in the public library. I was seduced by the blurb on the back (though it would turn out to contain no fewer than three devastating spoilers. What's that about, Gollancz?)

The book is witty and fun in parts but it's also quite mean-spirited in a way I didn't like at all. It's filled with accounts of the protagonist getting the best of bureaucrats and other stuffed shirts: boring little stories that go on and on with every phone call and threatening letter detailed. These moments suggest an author who thinks that everyone around him is an incompetent, weak-willed idiot who probably shouldn't exist at all.

Some of this was confirmed when I finished the novel and read the introductory essay by Stephen Baxter. Baxter writes that The Door Into Summer's protagonist is an arch example of "Heinleinian Man," a hyper-competent individualist with no need for anyone else so long as he has his own genius (and maybe one other person to witness and admire his genius). This clicks somewhat with the descriptions I've seen of Heinlein as a "Libertarian".

To be "libertarian" really just means to be "anti-authoritarian" but is increasingly used to describe someone with a total belief in free market Capitalism and a disdain for the State. According to Baxter, Heinlein was one of those. "Why can't you morons all be more like me?", Heinlein seems to say, "why can't you just need nothing?" Well, we can't all be successful in this, can we? We don't all have the financial resources or the right brains or the sort of face that opens doors. "Everyone should be a self-sustaining genius like me" is no model for a society at all.

I admire the witty and competent people of the world but I also recognise that "be clever, on your own, with no help" is no solution to anything, so I began to wonder how one might square that circle. Is it possible to be something like a Heinleinian Man in society without being perfectly happy for the world beyond your own house to burn to the ground? Is there someone an Escapologist can admire on the opposite side of the colour wheel to Heinleinian Man, equally independent but also a good citizen?

Well, it's Sherlock Holmes, isn't it? Good old Auntie Shirley, contrary to the portrayals of him on TV, is a resourceful and self-sustaining clever-clogs who actually has time for the rest of the world.

Holmes uses his competence (and the free time it affords him) to willingly solve other people's problems with flare and a sense of social justice. He is helpful, useful in the world, and he loves his fellow citizens. He is kind.

Holmes routinely accepts no payment if he thinks his client would struggle to afford it, even lying to protect their dignity by saying he always works for free. Meanwhile, he accepts large rewards when solving problems for the wealthy, indicating a sort of renegade Socialism.

He's a patriot in the best possible way: not by hating or competing with the values of other nations (he routinely lends his talents to foreign states) and not as someone with a rancid nationalist fervor, but essentially as a good citizen who just wants the System to work for his community. He wants the System to serve everyone regardless of class or race (see The Adventure of the Yellow Face) or gender (this business of him "despising women" is a misunderstanding of what the phrase means and is contrary to his actual behavior towards women). His hatred of Moriarty is because Moriarty represents the corruption of a good System and the misdirection of Sherlockian competence.

God Bless Auntie Shirley, a blueprint for independent-minded people who have no disdain for their fellow citizens.

To be honest, I'm not sure how any Libertarian can truly hate the concept of State. It's almost a contradiction. I arrived at my own left-wing position through a desire for personal autonomy. If you believe in personal autonomy, surely you believe that everyone else deserves it too? People should be allowed to get on with their lives, and for that they need health and education and freedom to choose and fairness and justice and equality. You're not going to get that under Capitalism. Every thoughtful Anarchist, I'm convinced, ends up reinventing the State.

Despise unqualified or corrupt authority by all means, but a witty and competent person would also admire a system that works efficiently and well; one that pools resources to minimise waste and ensures an equity of access. One might be angry with the current System and might even want to tear it down and start again, but it's hard to see how anyone who revels in solving problems wouldn't want to see a benign, non-autocratic System that works for all of its citizens. So fuck you, Heinlein! You'll find me at 221b Baker Street!

Letter to the Editor: I Always Suspected This May Not Be a Good Way to Live

Hi Robert,

I'm a long-time fan of your blog. Your content is a breath of fresh air on an Internet plagued with work worship, life coaches, productivity tips and the "power lunch" mentality. I started reading your book yesterday and it's difficult to stop. Your writing style is a brain massage.

Let me tell you a little about myself: I'm Brazilian, male, 33 years old, and have what every parent here raises a child to get: a public-sector job. The admission exam for this type of job is very, very hard, demanding years of single-minded preparation. Once you pass it, your job entails massive boredom, senseless tasks and good pay, normally for life.

I always suspected that this may be not a good way to live, even before setting foot in an office. After twelve years of living this life my soul was in an advanced state of corrosion. The paycheck never brought the lasting happiness that everybody said it would. The material goods it made possible did not motivate me any longer.

The turning point was when I needed a haircut one day. To get a haircut I needed to program my schedule one week in advance to carve out twenty minutes for it. Enough! I was a slave on gold chains. This must not go on.

On this journey through open plan offices and noisy coffee machines, I always made sure to save my money, knowing full well that I would not be able to bear the 37 years of mandatory work for retirement. Last November I made a deal with management to take one day off per week (Wednesday) with the matching 20% reduction in pay. I had made very few decisions in my life as intelligent as this one.

With this improvement in my life came a change in perception about the value of work. I started living in a more leisurely way. I barely noticed the 20% pay cut but it was difficult not to notice a holiday every week.

A year later here I am: new hobbies, new interests, and far more content than ever before. Hell! I'm making wood sculptures when twelve months ago I didn't even know how to draw! In the workplace I'm a tech guy (the one with a spreadsheet for everything) and art apparently shouldn't be attempted by people like me! Yet here I am, having a blast at cutting wood, not typing numbers on a computer. Imagine how many people have too hidden talents that will never see daylight because a job sucks away all the energy.

In the centuries to come we're going to look to today's offices and feel the same as when we look for Industrial Revolution factories. How could we do that to people?

I'm grateful for you being a voice against the madness of work and so-called productivity. I realized I'm not alone and very happy to realize this relatively early on life.

I attached some images of the sculptures. It takes hours and hours to make one, but who's counting?

Best regards,
F

Unit Shifting Device

Not yet bought The Good Life for Wage Slaves? Well, it's my pleasure today to offer £3 off the book when you buy it through the publisher's website.

Just enter the coupon code M5Y8D43H at checkout. The offer lasts until November 10th, so get a wiggle on.

South Park. Sherlock Holmes. Mockingbird. You can't go wrong. Let me know how you get on.

Thanks again for reading. Stay safe and stay groovy.

Your friend,

Robert Wringham
www.newescapologist.co.uk
www.patreon.com/newescapologist